Making the grade

I was reading this article about rating magical artifacts. (They also rate character classes - Ranger isn't listed, but would surely get at least an A-) I figured it would be fun to give my magic items some grades. Here goes.

Justice Bringer
This Greatsword is 7 feet long and really sharp. It's my primary tool for battling evil and does a really top notch job. Ghosts and other non-corporeal type baddies beware! Justice Bringer can slice you to ribbons just as easily as it cuts an ordinary thug.
These things would clearly give any weapon a solid A rating, but Justice Bringer has even more. It once said "Bring me Justice", which is a pretty cool thing for a sword to do, and thanks to my grand wizard pal, Ezekiel Moonstartulip, it looks like it's constantly on fire! Know what else? It fits in a magical one foot long sheath for easy storage.
A+

Ring of Animal Friends
To tell you the truth I'm on pretty good terms with most animals anyways, so I don't really need a magic ring to help me out. The ring is made of wood and it's a little too tight if you ask me. I don't really like to wear it much. This is a good one to leave at home.
D

Gloves of Chimes and Miracles
Nothing makes a story more dramatic than mood music and sound effects. Since you can't always have a bard around these gloves are the next best thing. With a few waves of your hand appropriate sound is issued forth much to the delight of all. True, it's best to take these gloves off if you're sneaking around or your presence will be given away by subtle sneaking music or cartoonish footstep noises. These gloves won't help you fight evil, but they're still quite cool.
A-

Indestructible Mirror Quarter
How do you break and indestructible mirror? Simple. Use the back of a hatchet. Ever since we defeated that mirror I have carried around this perfectly indestructible quarter mirror. You'd be amazed how useful and indestructible object is. Additionally you can use it against Medusa or other gorgons, for peeking around corners, signaling travelers, and even to see what you are doing when shaving your beard. The only downside is a big triangle is not the most convenient thing to carry around. The corners are really pointy too. I've jabbed myself with 'em more than once.
B

More magical item ratings later.